"We were on a break!" Ross and Rachel Character Analysis

I would say that both Ross and Rachel agree they were on a break; what is in question here is what that break meant for each character. See the script below for the infamous moment where Ross and Rachel take a break, taken from Season 3, Episode 15 fittingly titled, The One Where Ross and Rachel Take a Break.

Script below taken from https://fangj.github.io/friends/season/0315.html; Season 3, episode 15

Rachel: Oh my God. I cannot keep having this same fight over and over again,

Ross, no, you’re, you’re, you’re making this too hard.

Ross: Oh I’m, I’m making this too hard. Okay, what do you want me to do.

Rachel: I don’t know, I don’t know. Urrrgh! Look, maybe we should take a break.

Ross: Okay, okay, fine, you’re right. Let’s ah, let’s take a break, (goes to the door) let’s cool off, okay, let’s get some frozen yogart, or something.. (opens the door)

Rachel: No. (Ross is standing in the doorway.) A break from us.

(Ross looks at her, then leaves slamming the door behind him.)

Looking at this from both character's perspectives (in my opinion):

Previous to the above discussion, Ross had been hurting as he felt Rachel didn't have enough time for him. On their anniversary he probably figured it was a guarantee they would spend time together so he was very happy and very much looking forward to it. Ross is also a romantic and having been in love with Rachel for a very long time, he likely wanted to make her feel special. He most certainly had high expectations about how their anniversary night would go. Not only did the night not go as he planned, they weren't even going to be able to spend time together which was the one thing that Ross had been craving and needing. The absolute last thing Ross is expecting is Rachel saying that they needed to take a break. Already hurt and frustrated at this point, I can only imagine the schock, anger, pain, sadness, confusion and slew of other emotions Ross felt as he slammed the door and left.

Previous to deciding they needed to take a break, Rachel had been feeling proud and independent as she got a new job that she was actually good at and enjoyed! If Ross understood what this job meant to Rachel, he certainly did not show it. Ross is jealous in general and very jealous when it comes to other guys showing Rachel any attention. His jealousy was out of control when it came to Mark and Rachel. His actions did not indicate that he trusted Rachel. Rarely do people just decide that their relationship needs a break on a whim so Rachel must have been feeling that they did for a while. Ross showing up at her work and accusing her again of having something with Mark was the last straw.

Rachel did describe the break as a "break from us" meaning a break from Ross and Rachel, so yes, they were "on a break", but she did not say "it is over". Ross is a smart guy and so I know he knows exactly what a break is. I can picture him quoting the definition of a break to Rachel if roles had been reversed. A break is merely an interruption of continuity (meaning it will continue) or a pause. No where in the definition of a break does it mention the end of something. I do not for a minute think that Ross did not understand this. Ross doesn't like to take responsibility for things and tries blames others (he blamed a lot of things on Chandler in college for instance) and in my opinion he knows he hurt Rachel by sleeping with Chloe, but he doesn't want to 100% take responsibility for his actions.

While at the bar on the phone with Rachel, when he heard Mark in the background his jealousy kicked in, he made a lot of assumptions, and as smart as he is, instead of communicating with Rachel and allowing her to explain the situation and her feelings, he decided what Mark being there meant. In his jealous stupor, he made a decision that forever changed their relationship. He knew they weren't broken up and decided to sleep with Chloe anyway. He knew he did wrong or he would not have tried to make sure Rachel found out. And he tried to explain it away saying that for all he knew a break meant they were broken up. Based on my interpretation of Ross' character, I do not buy this for a second.

The infamous "WE WERE ON A BREAK" does not exempt him from any wrong doing. He is right - they were on a break. Too bad for him break does not mean the end and he knows it. He tried to use the break as an excuse for his behaviour as he certainly would never want to be accused of being a cheater. Unfortunately for Ross, in my opinion, he did cheat. I am on Team Rachel.

FOR WRITERS: Analyzing already exisiting characters' actions in given situations is a great exercise to see how the writing - the dialogue and actions written for them - shape how the readers or viewers see your characters.

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